Once you see your baby girl’s face, your whole life changes

December 2, 2012

in Adoption, Family, Memories, Photos

On December 2, 2008, Ed and I saw Molley’s beautiful little face for the first time. I’ve shared the story many times, so there’s nothing new to add to the facts.

On the one year anniversary of Molley’s referral, we were so grateful to be a family, still working hard to find our footing.

On our two year anniversary of Molley’s referral, we were so grateful to be a family, really feeling comfortable with our lives.

On our three year anniversary of Molley’s referral, we were so grateful to be a family, cognizant of what it means on many levels to have been formed through adoption.

Molley has grown over the past year in so many ways. We just visited the doctor this week. She’s still in the 95th percentile for height on the American growth charts. She’s still physically and intellectually advanced well beyond her age.

But lately, she’s really becoming more of her own special person. She’s funny and comfortable with herself. She is confident but not cocky.

Molley clings to me tightly. She been exploring the bigger parts of what adoption means. She wants to know that we’ll never leave her. She knows that she lost a mom before I became hers and sometimes, that worries her. She asks questions — so many deep and thoughtful questions — as she processes it all.

I’ve changed, too. I’ve learned from mistakes, perceived or real, in handling issues related to adoption and race. I’ve learned how to be a better parent to Molley. I’ve learned that stubborness shouldn’t always be met with stubbornness. I’ve learned that below that tough layer lies a very soft spot. I’ve learned that there’s no point in borrowing trouble and that sometimes, it really is wise to take it day by day.

We’ve watched Molley’s relationship with Mattix grow even more. When I look at my kids, I see a brother and sister who truly make each other’s worlds go round. I see her happily give up some independence to accept her big brother’s help and attention.

I see her returning the sweet gestures to her big brother that he’s shown her for years. I now catch myself saying to her, “Wow, that was so kind. Mattix is really lucky to have such a thoughtful little sister” almost as often as I say to Mattix, “Wow, that was so kind. Molley is lucky to have such a thoughtful big brother.”

I see her both acting on what she’s learned from her older brother and acting in her own unique and unbelievably sweet ways.

And I’ve been reminded that Molley does everything, and I mean everything, on her own schedule – whether that’s years ahead of when I would anticipate or years after, she does it when she’s ready to do it.

As I have been on December 2 for the past three years, today I am full of gratitude that I have the privilege of being her mom. I say it often, but it’s the truth: I don’t know what I did to deserve it, but it must have been something good.

Molley is an absolute gift. She radiates beauty from within. We know she’s beautiful on the outside. It’s impossible to miss that. But it’s the true beauty on the inside that shines through and makes her glow.

{Molley at referral in December 2009, in December 2010 and December 2011}

{Molley in December 2012}

 

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Kate SDDS December 3, 2012 at 7:46 am

She is such a beautiful girl – happy anniversary of your special day! You are an awesome Mama!

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Laura December 6, 2012 at 1:38 am

Thank you, Kate. xo

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Cookin' Canuck December 3, 2012 at 8:23 am

What a beautiful little girl! She has a sparkle in her eye that suggests that she is a happy girl, secure in herself and her loving family.

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Laura December 6, 2012 at 1:37 am

Thank you, Dara!

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Stephanie Elliot December 3, 2012 at 4:13 pm

I just see her as the type of girl where people want to come up to her to talk with her. She seems so endearing, even through just pictures and words you write. And when you say she does things on her own time, it doesn’t even sound like she’s being stubborn, just that that’s the way she is, like she’ll do things on her own time, when she’s ready, like there is no rushing in her life. She sounds so cool and unique, and so neat to have!

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Laura December 6, 2012 at 1:37 am

She is that type of person – the one who people want to talk to her. But she’s TOTALLY stubborn. ;) xoxo

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angela December 4, 2012 at 6:09 am

She is luminous, and I love that you can just see the confidence and joy in her face.

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Laura December 5, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Thank you, Angela!!

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