Mattix’s preschool year ended. I cried. (Really.) I remember when Mattix was a baby and things were so hard and all I could think was, “When will he sleep for more than an hour at a time?” And now he sleeps for nine or ten hours at a time and he only has one year of preschool left and all I can think is, “How did he get so big?”
That’s one of the things about being a parent. Mixed with the really hard times that you want to pass are really amazing times that you want to hold onto. But you can’t pick and choose and they all pass, like it (sleep? yes, please) or not (sweet little baby dancing – all awkward and unbalanced).
Today was so nice, but really hard for me. It all hit me like a ton of bricks. I spent the entire day with the kids, only getting out my computer for an hour to work. If they’d have allowed me, I would have just sat on the couch and held them for six hours. But, of course, a four-year-old is way too busy for that.
Molley was so pleased to go to Matty’s party, and he was happy to have her there. You’d think they both received a certificate of accomplishment. (Ignore her hair flower situation. She was having way too much fun in the jumpy house.)
Tiffani and Nick were in town for her sister’s wedding and despite their insanely busy schedule, they stopped by the party. Mattix’s face was so bright it shined. He fought tears when they had to leave. He suggested (again) tonight that Tiffani come live in the empty room and help take care of he and Moll. (Tiffani was our first nanny – eight hours a week in the beginning, after Mattix had been home for six months. I needed two small breaks a week to keep my sanity. She has been through so much with us and I talk about her a lot here.)
Before I stop, I want to mention how life-altering the right teachers can be. I wouldn’t care if Mattix didn’t learn a single concept, number or letter in school – the difference in his confidence, speech, social skills and expression from his first day of school to his last is so great it cannot be measured.
He has been shown love, patience and kindness and given confidence, guidance and skills that have changed his life. He wanted to hug each of his teachers several times today. If you know my baby, hugs are not handed out freely. I am forever grateful to the women who worked to grow the strong foundation Ed and I built during his first 2.5 years with us. I used to laugh at people who spent the equivalent of state college tuition on their children’s preschool education.
Here I am, spoon-feeding myself my words.
I’m happy to eat them.